Human????

I'm very convinced that's very complicated and also weird to be a humam being. I guess I was not meant to be one, or, I was so long not human that I'm having a hard time with managing this whole breathing, having body odors, sicknesses, growing nails and hair, breath, body fat, PMS, an so on.
Like, when you get sick and then you need to go to a lab to pee in a cup, I mean, come on, how nasty is that? Then, need to clip my nails, get my hair cut, use deodorant (please!), deal with general body odors, specially period odor (naaaaaaaasty). Take vitamins, the pill, floss my teeth, use moisturizer, wax all the extra hair, having to eat healthy food... And when we die our body becomes a mess, the hair and nails continue to grow... Aaaaaargh, that's why I want to be cremated!

"My first time, hard to explain
Rush of blood, oh, and a little bit of pain
On a cloudy day, it's more common than you think
He's my first mistake...
Maybe you were all faster than me
We gave each other up so easily
These silly little wounds will never mend
I feel so far from where I've been
So I go, and I will not be back here again
I'm gone as the day is fading on white houses
I lie, wrote my injuries all in the dust
In my heart is the five of us
In white houses"

No imagination

Inside a bus, during work, in my bed... that's when I feel like writing! Amazing! I'll never get out everything that I want when I need...
Well, let me see, the last thing that has happened... actually it was been happening for as long as I've been dating. It's all fine and perfect, really, but since nothing is perfect in life my relationship has an expiration date and something tells me its gonna be a year from now. And as much as I know that there is somebody for me and somebody else out there for both of us, it is very hard to understand or even accept.
How can something that is so perfect not meant to be? Really, somebody explain that to me! Sometimes I wish we've never met... then again, this is going to be the only really decent and good relationship that I'll be able to remember for the rest of my life... Then what? I guess it would be easier to end if it was a shitty relationship, I wouldn't feel guilty nor have this feeling of complete loss...
At least I know I'm not alone in this and for whatever is worth... We'll see how this is going to end...

What now

It's amazing how for every period of my life there is a song for it, and right now, this is it. And it's a happy song! And it's really me, I feel good. I guess that now I'm okay. :)

So Far Away
This is my life
Its not what it was before
All these feelings I’ve shared
And these are my dreams
That I’d never lived before
Somebody shake me
Cause I,I must be sleeping
Chorus:Now that we're here
Its so far away
All the struggle
We thought was in vainAnd all the mistakes
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
And now that we're here, I'ts so far away
And I feel like I can face the day
And I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed
To be the person that I am today
These are my words
That I’ve never said before
I think I’m doing okay
And this is the smile
That I’ve never shown before
Somebody shake me
Cause II must be sleeping
Chorus:Now that we're here
Its so far away
All the struggle
We thought was in vain
And all the mistakes
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
And now that we're here, Its so far away
And I feel like I can face the day
And I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed
To be the person that I am today
I’m so afraid of waking
Please don't shake me
Afraid of waking
Please don't shake me
Chorus:Now that we're here
Its so far away
All the struggle
We thought was in vain
And all the mistakes
One life contained
They all finally start to go away
And now that we're here, Its so far away
And I feel like I can face the day
And I can forgive
And I’m not ashamed
To be the person that I am today

Arrrrrgh!

I DO NOT WANNA BE A MOMMY!!
I DO NOT WANNA BE A MOMMY!!
I DO NOT WANNA BE A MOMMY!!
I DO NOT WANNA BE A MOMMY!!
Did I make myself clear?
Like usual, there is so much to say, so little time, and yet, I have forgotten everything.
I've been with the man of my dreams and yet I've been told that he's not mine. Okay, what's up with that?? How can something feel so damn right and YET is not supposed to be? I'm very pissed about that. Though, I must confess that sometimes I feel just a friendship coming on... But, couldn't it be BECAUSE what I've been told? Confusing, very confusing.
For now, I'll just enjoy the perfection in my life and we'll see about the future later.
I'm very tired of work; as the work itself. I want to work with what I really want, not this, well, at least not at the place I am right now. It's overwhelming!! Gotta a test tomorrow... If you're not happy with something, you gotta do something about it, just complaining won't work so I'm taking matters into action!
Well, that's life, I did have important statements to make to myself.
::shrugs:: Who cares, I'm the only one who reads this anyway! LOL
Well, off I go... wanna watch so senseless tv... be back someday....