Letter

Letter

I cannot afford to NOT get in college because of someone else, neither can I let this affect me in a way that I lose my balance and concentration so, because of this, I decided to write a letter to my ex although I will not send it, it just a matter of letting all out, expressing the way I'm feeling since I feel sufocated by all of it.

"I hate all of of this, I hate that I love you that I miss you and most of all that it seems you do not feel the same. You can tell me as many times as you want that you miss me to and that you think about me everyday, but if that was true you would've come talk to me, and don't even say that the reason you haven't done that is because I told you so, if you really cared for me you wouldn't care, and would come talk to me. It's simple as that.
At the same time I hate you because I feel you betrayed me, you decided that we wouldn't stay together and just didn't let me know. You, slowly detached yourself from me and our relationship while having me by your side because it's easier this way and that's just not fair. I guess human beings are really rotten and this whole "better her than me" story really happens. I don't know what to think; either I feel as I was in a terminal stage of a fatal disease and you were just waiting for me to die (because it's better this way) or just very stupid and you were waiting for me to realize that it was all over and break up with you.
I can only say one thing: I'm more of a man than you are. You are low, very low and does not deserve my respect. I HAD the balls to put an end to this when actually you were the one that wanted this all along.
I hate it because it's not fair, you moved on and left me behind stuck on a dead-end relationship and that I cannot focus my life on anything else but you, bitch!
It's okay, I'll find someone who deserves me and I'll forget you, but you, you will remember for a long time."